I don't get to spend as much time as I'd like with some of my friends. There's always something going on and before you know it, you look up and a year or five is gone. Just gone. You never know what's gonna happen tomorrow but somehow you let day after day go by just like they'll always be there to waste. I'm as guilty of it as anyone.
Today Grey and I chatted online a bit. We don't get a chance to do that as much as we used to when we were both at our old jobs. We talked about random and mundane things like the narcissistic behavior that we indulged in when we were younger but don't seem to have the time or energy to devote to it now.
And then suddenly the tone of the conversation changed. Out of the blue, he expressed a wish to be able to see me more often. "I just wish you were around to hang with, play D&D with, eat sushi with," he said, and I responded quickly with a, "Me, too."
It made me a little sad and somehow he was able to tell that it had even though I didn't say a word. He hadn't said it to make me sad, he assured me, but because he just felt it and needed to say it. I let him know that it was okay -- that it was the melancholy sad that comes with the realization that your life is passing you by and you're letting it. It was a sad meant to inform and instruct.
But a piece of me was happy he'd said it too. It means I matter, and who doesn't need that?
((Song: "Fly Like An Eagle" by the Steve Miller Band. Lyrics here:
http://www.thepeaches.com/music/nicedecade/FlyLikeAnEagle.htm))
