In keeping with the spirit of my last entry, I've determined to forget about relocating for the foreseeable future. The job that I wanted will be available again come spring 2008 and if I still want to pursue it, I can. For the moment I'll pursue other avenues here, get settled, adjust to the changes that will take place, and go from there.
So I've been trying to get a promotion at the company where I'm currently employed. I had an interview last week and I'm still waiting on the verdict. It's an assistant region manager position in title, but the job description is more on the order of manager. I'll be pushing for pay that reflects that distinction should they offer it to me -- which will be an approximate $3 an hour raise. I fully expect them to refuse. If so, I'll be on my way to find a job that pays me about $1-$2 more an hour with half the responsibility.
Talking about my personal relationships is a bit harder. I'd like to say that things have settled down -- and to a large extent they have -- but there are still so many things that keep coming up over and over again. Turning up like a bad penny, so to speak. I understand from whence they come but it doesn't make it any easier to deal with. There's a part of me that feels as though I am talking to a wall. That part of me is a bitter, impatient part that wonders, what the hell have I been talking to you about over and over and over and over? Do you have a set idea of how you think I feel, and if what I actually do feel doesn't match with that, you dismiss what I am saying and tell me I don't actually feel that at all? And how dare you tell me how I feel? And don't you realize that this feeling I have had -- that my feelings and thoughts have to be a certain thing or they aren't valid -- is one of the very things that has been so damned damaging to us?
No. I don't think he does. Grrrrrrr.
I've been talking with a friend lately about having relationships that are equal and respectful. I'll be adding a post here and there about that soon.
((Song: "Tears Dry On Their Own" by Amy Winehouse. Lyrics:
http://www.inetlyrics.com/amy_winehouse/tears_dry_on_their_own.htm))
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