The phone rang this morning around 7 am as I was packing my things to head to work. I figured it had to be the ex, and sure enough, it was. He's begun the practice of calling me at that time because he's in his truck heading to work, by himself, and can therefore speak to me without worrying if the kiddo is around poking her nose and ears into everything.
His first words?
"Well.....have you heard the news?"
In that fraction of a second that existed before I said, "No," my brain did that fill in the blank thing. What it filled in was, "You and Yo are getting married."
Because yes, I think they eventually might. It's only been seven or eight months since they've been going out but the ex was never just a dating type. He wants a permanent woman. He's not good doing the by himself sort of thing.
And if they do, I have to wonder....how will he tell me about it? Will he be awkward? Unsure? Will it just tumble out all in a rush?
But that's not what he said, of course. He was letting me know the latest in kiddo's relationship saga. Seems her ex-girlfriend's parents have decided to let the two girls talk again. This is a big step for her parents; they'd initially had a religious and moral cataplexy and had barred the girls from spending time together. The girls haven't really seen too much of each other for about a year.
Anyway, the kiddo is quite happy. It was my job to counsel prudence and forethought on her part in order to maintain this sudden turn of events. I did that job in between a run to the bookstore to pick up "The Princess Bride" (a book she's required to read in her English class) and some zombie book by a guy named Max Brooks. She told me she'd already thought of that and was planning to treat this like the second chance she knew it was.
I dropped her off at her house and the ex was there. We spoke to the kiddo a bit about her grades -- one of which is threatening to put her into grounding mode -- and then after a bit of lecturing/griping/general parenting, I got in my car to head home.
A mixture of emotions went with me, the old familiar trio of guilt and sadness and relief. They've lessened over the passing months but they've yet to go away completely. I've told myself over and over in my life that emotions that you don't confront never really go away but just hide somewhere dark until they sense it's safe to come out again.
Am I confronting these? I'm not sure yet. Guess I'll find out someday.
((Song: "Call The Police" by James Morrison. Lyrics here:
http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/jamesmorrison/callthepolice.html ))
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